February 2012
4 posts
Economically challenged...
The coffee shop was almost empty, but he was still there. What are the odds of running into the same person over and over again? Last week I met him at the restaurant, the week before he happened to be at my house, and the week before that, someone had invited him to come to my birthday party. It’s not that I minded having him there. He was a really nice guy, with black unmanageable hair,...
FB is annoying
FB is annoying, therefore me and facebook are on a BREAK! :)
January 2012
6 posts
How to deal with those pesky telemarketer people
(copyright by ‘ze frank’)
1. Use a husky, dirty phone sex voice but ask normal questions about the proposed offer. “Is it a low interest rate? mmmmm…I like low interest rates…really low…”
2. In an outrageously excited tone: “Thank god you called!!!” Explain that an online psychic told you that your future lover would randomly call disguised as an asshole.
3. Say you are hard of hearing and see...
Things that make me happy:
Goodies from Germany
Old and new friends meet at a big hole in the ground (aka Grand Canyon)
Old and new friends showing me Hawaii :)
Old and new friends doing ministry together (like eating cupcakes) :)
Kitchen work duty with a bunch of crazy kids (peeling 70+ potatoes)
Ministry
Things I’d never done before
Looking freaking cool in photos
Visiting Amsterdam
...
4 tags
December 2011
9 posts
1 tag
Xmas gift bags for inmates →
Link →
Black Friday Yearly Challenge (aka Black Friday... →
November 2011
19 posts
Homemade everything?!
Today I looked into homemade chapstick, lotion, soap and shampoo. Mainly because some of my friends got into it… They love it and are brewing little potions all over the place and thanks to social networking, they let us all know about it.
So I thought I’d check it out.
But it’s not gonna happen for me.
Chapstick: For whatever weird reason I am allergic to chapstick. Lip...
2 tags
I can feel it coming...
The debate! It will be there.
It happens every year around this time.
And every year I HATE it!
I think it’s so silly and stupid.
But it’s about being politically correct.
Yay.
Who gives a s***?
Sorry for the profanity.
But it’s true.
No one does.
The world is a place full of injustice.
The kid prostitutes I saw in Thailand know that.
The beggar on the steps...
Germany...
There shall be lots of pictures…
Lots and lots of pictures….
Wanna remind me to take some? :)
What was my Dad doing in the office in the...
It’s a fascinating question - You got to admit that…
My Dad was a negotiator for the union. Roughly meaning his job was to sit down with the employers and work out a raise in salary etc. That stuff I get. He was often gone until late at night. Those negotiations would not start until 9pm.
But then there were office days… And it puzzles me. This is in the eighties. Before...
Meyers Briggs funny stuff 8
Cup or water? Half empty or Half full?
More glasses
ENFJ — There’s more than enough for friends to share.
ENFP — Whooeee! Water fight!
INFP — But look! A crystalline vessel, filled with shimmering, life-giving nectar!
INFJ — Senator Hophnagle used the rest of it for his mud pie project.
ENTJ — A “full” glass of water, please.
INTJ —...
News from the past 2 months
God and me. Together.
It’s been a crazy couple months filled with LOTS of meetings, training (to go into prisons) and learning the new culture of this thing called God Behind Bars.
It’s been great so far! I get to work with some fantastic people who are on fire for the Lord and have a deep passion to bring God into the lives of prisoners world wide. But for now we are focusing on Las Vegas (and...
This is just amazing... :)
clientsfromhell:
Client: “I’m looking to open a Christian dating website.”
Me: “Okay… I noticed the Darwin fish on the bumper of your car—are you actually Christian?”
Client: “Oh, God no. But I figure it’ll be like shooting fish in a barrel.”
Me: “…”
Client: “Only for every fish I shoot, Jesus will make, like, 40 more of them, right. (Huge belly-laughs)”
Meyers Briggs funny stuff 7
MBTI types as Cats
ESFP “The Hedonist”: The social cat. Inside, outside, contact-oriented. Wallows in petting. Lies in the sun on the driveway. Promiscuously affectionate, even with cat-haters. Meows a lot.
ESTP “The Tomcat”: Comes back after three days with scabs on his nose and ears. Fathered too many kittens to count. Will enjoy you while he’s there, but not...
Meyers Briggs funny stuff 6
1. If you prayed:
ENTJ: Lord, help me slow downandnotrushthroughwhatIdo.
ISTJ: Lord, help me to relax my focus on insignificant details, even though any of them may cause significant problems later. Begin this tomorrow at 8:31:04 am.
ISTP: God, please help me to consider other people’s feelings, even if most of them ARE excessively hypersensitive.
ESTP: God help me to accept...
Meyers Briggs funny stuff 5
2. Extroversion
An Extrovert, working at the supermarket produce department, is approached by a customer who asks to buy half a head of lettus. The Extrovert, disbelieving, responds, “I don’t know, I’ll have to ask the manager.” He consults the manager, unaware that the customer is following him. “Some idiot wants half a head of lettus…” Suddenly...
Meyers Briggs funny stuff 4
1. How many ______ does it take to change a light bulb?
xSFJ: One. Because they have to do everything around here, and no one appreciates them!
xSTJ: Two. One to read the instructions line by line, and the other to argue about the interpretation of them, eventually agreeing and changing the bulb together.
xSFP: Two. One to complain that it’s dark, and another to cajole some other...
Meyers Briggs funny stuff 3
16 Reasons Why the Chicken Crossed the Road
ENTJ : Because I ordered it to cross the road
ENTP: Imagine if chickens continually keep crossing the road. It could be used as a renewable power source!
INTJ: Chickens are stupid.
INTP: Er, I didn’t see it. Must have been thinking about something else…
INFJ: How can you be so insensitive as to question the motive of the poor...
Meyers Briggs funny stuff 2
Cheesy pick-up lines by type.
ISTJ: Stand still so I can pick you up.
ISFJ: If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I’d be walking through my garden forever.
ESTJ: Is it hot in here, or is it just me?
ESFJ: (hold out hand) Would you hold this for me while I go for a walk?
ISTP: Hello. Are you taking any applications for a boy/girlfriend?
ISFP: Hello. Cupid called. He says to...
Meyers Briggs funny stuff 1
You better know who you are in these, otherwise, not funny at all! :)
Just for reference, I’m an ISTP
Why did the ESFP cross the road?
To get to the party on the other side!
Why did the ESTP cross the road?
To showcase his miraculous three-in-one road-crossing foot healers.
Why did the ISFP cross the road?
Well, you see, there was this butterfly and—oh look, there it is...
October 2011
5 posts
1 tag
September 2011
10 posts
A sarcastic look at song lyrics:
Today: Grenade by Bruno Mars
‘I’d catch a grenade for ya. Throw my hand on a blade for ya. I’d jump in front of a train for ya. You know I’d do anything for ya. But you won’t do the same.’
So let’s go through this chorus:
I’d catch a grenade for ya. throw my hand on a blade for ya. I’d jump in front of a train for ya. You know I’d do...
A sarcastic look at song lyrics:
Today: If I die young by Band Perry
‘If I die young bury me in satin, lay me down on a bed of roses, sink me in a river at dawn, send me away with the words of a love song.’
Let’s just go through it line by line:
If I die young.
Let’s talk about what’s young? Are you still considered young if you are in your early? Mid? Late twenties? Thirties? Its perspective...
Adventures
Every day can be an adventure. Adventure simply means it’s an exciting or unusual experience. Getting your coffee at starbucks can become an adventure when you have an unusual name. Like mine.
No, not Jackie. My real name is frauke and in the beginning of life in the US of A I was still stupid enough to use that name and expect people to be able to pronounce it. It’s like sticking...
My trip to Germany is 2 months away
Not that I have a ticket yet or anything… But the plan is there: Visit my Mum for her 70th Birthday! Seems like a good idea to make an appearance again after 2 years. She will probably be happy to see me. So will my brother and his family.
Sooooooo, here are some things that I am NOT looking forward to in Germany (generally the place where God kissed the earth after creation…)
- Not...
A little tour of the jail - Part 2
No judgement, no agenda. Just what I saw:
Overcrowding: Where up to 20 people sleep on cots in one big room and there’s nothing to do for them
Finding out that in Clark County kids cannot visit their parent.
Pregnant mothers who’s babies will be taken away at birth if they don’t organise some family
A crazy schedule with breakfast at 3:30am so the inmates can make court...